For My Birthday

For my birthday, he bought be a mouse and mp3 player. He later said I should ask what my friends thought of a gift that was logical, functional and practical or something like that.

More Slowly Adjusting

Been hanging out with him even more. And, I'm slowly slowly accepting the two of us. It's still bad that I feel this way, but I'm warming up to the idea. I do have to say that he wants to treat me really well. I mean, I mention something and he's like, let's do that. I feel bad that I didn't invite him to do this hike I did with other friends this weekend. I was gone all day, and said we could hang out after the hike. Only, the hike took longer,and then we went to eat, and I was so tired afterward, so I had to cancel. He was so understanding about it...I didn't even have to cancel, he just offered. When we are alone, I'm good. But when we are out in public, I just clamp up. And, he puts up with it!

Slowly Adjusting

I'm very slowly adjusting...Part of me thinks I need to just jump; Make it public, change the fb status or something. Part of me is still shy and hesitant, I still want to hide him and the fact we're together. I think there's no denying we're together, but it's just so bad I still feel the need to hide us. I have been slowly warming to the idea, but as a friend pointed out...it's not good to feel this way. I know it, i've always known it. Even if I can get past the hesitation now, I think these things will come out later.

The 40 Questions to Ask a New Guy

A gf of mine asked if I did the 40 Questions with him. What is that? ...I said. Ohh...that would have been good to know.... I must blog about this. The reasons to ask are obvious, I think. I have always had some version of this to ask, but I think there is utility in presenting it as "here are my 40 questions" becomes a bit of a game. Of course, what the answers mean depends on each person. And, it's up to you to ask the follow up questions of how long ago, frequency, etc. Are any really deal breakers? If someone has done the worst but proclaims "reform", I'd probably melt and think awe, but he want's to change.... is that okay? Especially if someone will admit to some of these things, could I really hold it against him?

So, these are the "40 questions" to ask every new guy. If nothing else it's a good way to get to know someone, his past.

currently married, been married?
last relationship,
longest relationship,
shortest relationship,
long distance relationship,
friends with benefits (refers to long term),
casual hook ups,
cheated on a gf,
multiple cheating,
one night stand,
how long/typical wait before sex,
sex with married person,
minor
animals,
objects, fetishes, other extreme practices
multiple people,
multiple people and objects,
in the butt
incorporation of violence; s& m
drug use; drugs and sex (what kinds),
alcohol consumption level,
pay for sex,
another man,
kiss etc. another a man,
number of partners; rate/estimate partners per year for last 3 years
self stimulation/gratification
regular physical check ups,
STDs/diseases,
ever unprotected sex,
how often unprotected sex,
do you have children
get a girl pregnant/abortion,
forced a girl to do something she didn't want,
persuaded a girl to do something she didn't want,
did something with a girl you regret/not proud of.

Ok, there are only 35...so I need 5 more...If you can think of others, send them my way and I'll add them.

Update Part 3

I'm slowly adjusting to the idea of dating/being with my friend. There are just so many comparisons I make with the last friend-to-more relationship. I mean, then it worked for a while, but I also think that the friendship part masked that the relationship was too friend-like. It's just so contrary to how I've been conceptualizing how to find true love. I just imagined meeting, dating and being completely enamored. Here, it's like, we've been friends for a year or two, and then "suddenly" he's interested? Just don't trust it. But, we weren't really friends, more like acquaintances, until more recently. And, I can't even remember when he and I first met...that's how unmemorable it was. I do remember seeing him a couple times before meeting him, and then finally remembering who he was. I also remember thinking he was odd, harmless but odd. Ugh! and now look at him and me...together. Ugh!

Friend update part 2

I'm still "hanging out" with this friend. I'm super confused, but he is just so wonderfully patient with me. I really want to hide this, keep it hidden, but I feel this obligation to disclose, at least to my blog friends. The fact that he likes me and treats me well, so far, is so different from what I've experienced.

Dune Buggying

A friend and her bf, invited me to go dune buggy-ing with another friend they wanted me to meet. Actually, the four of us had dinner the other night, and at dinner discussed going on an off-roading adventure. We went last night, Mon night, and it was super cool and fun. It was cold since there are no windows or doors, and we rode on the road before getting to the off-road. The guy was nice, polilte etc. Great way to spend a Mon night! As for the guy...it's just so hard to tell. I mean, we rode together, and he was nice enough. But there really wasn't much in common. I mean...dune buggying who does that?...it's a whole new world for me..these people who ride the trails. As interesting as that was, and as appreciateive as I was, there wasn't a whole lot in common.

Meanwhile, I'm still hanging out with my "friend". Don't quite know why...but I'm trying really hard to be open minded. On a certain objective level, I recognize the things we have in common. But, I can't get over this bias/prejudice/what not I have against him. I even told him this, and I thought that was funny.