New Guy #2: "D"

Got off phone with New Guy #2: "D". 2 hours. Long @#$#! time. I'm exhausted, but at least this time there was no strange past relationship discussion. D's issue is he talks way too much, too fast and too long. I kept on saying to him "it's whoosh, overwhelming, too much, take a chill pill." It's so counter intuitive, but the more I push, the more "intrigued" they become. I think the new strategy will be to be silent and reserved. Honestly, I think that is what I'm looking for. Someone to have a normal, engaging, mentally stimulating conversation with. Not where I have to "yell" back off, where fiestiness is construed for interest.

New Guy # 1: "R"

R had 10 strikes against him before I met him at Starbucks tonight. I mean...there was the sleepy/drunken-look photo, the WAY TOO MANY emails, which now, in retrospect makes sense. Maybe we rushed things. Our first call was today, and we met today. We spoke briefly in the morning. Then, we spoke in the afternoon, around 3p.m. and said I was on my way to Costco for a couple hours, but could meet up with him afterwards, i.e., around 5p.m. He said okay, he had to be at the airport at 8p.m. I call back at 5:30p.m. and said let's meet up if he still has time. He said okay, but had wasn't ready and had to shower first. Huh?! All along, he seems super sleepy-tired, but I can't really tell if he just talks like that. Did I wake him up at 3 PM? Apparently I did. He shows up late (but he did call to say he would be right there). He shows up with hair spiked-in-the-middle, 2 inches high. It's 6:50 p.m. and he had previously said he should leave around 7-ish to pick up his friends from the airport by 8p.m. He's not very talkative, is he just sleepy-tired? Have I mentioned that before? He took 2 phone calls during our conversation. His friends called to say they were waiting at the airport for him. (The airport is 30 miles away) I said he should go. He said "naw". I'm sure he meant well by me, but what I saw was complete flaking on his friends. BUT, he did text message me right after to say "You seem like a cool gal." Awh....

Happy New Year!!

I am "girl on a mission": I am on match.com; signed up with eharmony; submitted myself to selectivesearch; and will likely join chemistry.com. Is there any more that I can possibly do? Will something come about in 2008?

I shouldn't complain too much. December has been a popular month. I've gotten several inquiries from new guys, mostly through match. The difficulty has been finding time with the holidays, trip planning and trip taking. I was haw-flaking but am now recommitted to taking the "dating project" seriously. That means, actually emailing, calling and meeting even though it's a bit of a drag. With all the potentials, I've managed to not actually meeting anyone this month.

On that note, I called a new guy: "R". He emailed me WAY TOO MUCH, but the new me attitude said "proceed regardless". He sounded normal enough on the phone and we may meet for coffee today. I called new guy2: "P" and left a message. He too emailed WAY TOO MUCH, but the directive is clear "proceed regardless".

I got the most flattering initial email from new guy3. Now, looking at the pictures, not much interest. But, really it was quite a flattering email. An excerpt: "I keep coming across you profile and it's one of the most interesting one's I've read yet... It's simple: honest and open, and you TRULY have an interesting, quirky sense of humor! I like that....You've definitely got style my friend!" Of course, the skeptical side says "it's a line it's a line its a line" I haven't responded yet and haven't decided how to respond.

A First Conversation First

I just got off the phone with a new one, after 1 1/2 hours. "Wow! it must have been special" is what you may be thinking. But no, no, no. It was interesting but hardly promising. This guy is whack. I mean, all his exes have been crazy girls (one stole money, another had on-going relations with her exes, and another bought herself a ring and told friends they were engaged). Very entertaining to listen to, but WAY too much drama. I told him: drama attracts like; he should look "inside"; "not really interested", "yeah, you kinda did scare me off." And, all the more he's interested.

Really?

There a couple new guys from match. What is with the "what IM do you use?" question. I mean, have you not heard of a phone? I like IM and email but talking is much faster. I know there is a new generation out there that is more socially comfortable with IMing. But, not me.

What should I do?

Oh so the match.com guy who stood me up months and months ago wrote to me again. I completely changed my name and profile and picture so I've been getting the same people. I should just close him and ignore. But part of me wants to see what he says. Now that I'm wiser...I'll be ready. Is that mean? worth my time? It could be fun!

Attitude Adjustment

I need an attitude adjustment. For those who are not familiar, eharmony has what it calls "guided communication". For the first few communication exchanges, you don't just write to the person. First you exchange a list of pre-selected questions, multiple choice answers. For example: If you decided to stay at home for the evening would you tend to (a) watch tv (b) talk on the phone (c)clean (d) read. By the third round or so, you write your own answer. Only after this process of pre-selected back and forth, do you enter into an "open" communication phase, where you can freely write back and forth.

Okay... so I'm like a kid in an elevator pushing the buttons indiscriminately...if only I could push them all at once. But instead, "a"-sure why not; "c" no I'll try for "d" this time. I mean, how helpful is that?...to review a multiple choice answer. I've been answering everyone's questions. And, because I'm bored and bored and bored I just zip right through it all, barely paying attention to what's said, what my response is, who's who, like I really care...

~~HURRY~~

I know it's me, but I'm really discouraged and annoyed by the on-line methods of matching. It's SO contrived, and there is NO ONE of any interest. I mean NO ONE. Okay, so it's only been a few days, but it'd be nice to know that there is some quality out there. I skipped a social today. Maybe I should have gone, but I didn't want to eat more holiday junk. I forgot about the goal to meet as many people as possible.

New Directions

Okay, so I'm not really trying a new direction in this quest of mine. If I could think of a new direction, I would set forth and go. I've exhausted match.com, so now it's time for eharmony. I'm officially signed up, but I am already irritated at it. They do this guided communication thing, where you can only ask preset questions, and the responses are multiple choice. I think its pretty odd. I have to keep an open mind, so I will, but for now, I think it's pretty dump. Blllththththt...!

Meeting People

I just came back from a talk on the Iraq war, presented by a retired Marine Colonel. What does this have to do with boys and this blog, you may be wondering. I was rather energized by the talk, and realized that I value a sense of country/patriotism. So, add that to the growing list of requirements.

I went on second date, a movie--No Country for Old Men--with HR. He's nice but not my type. I need to move on, but don't know how to tell him. After our date, he called me to make sure I got home alright. Isn't that nice? I feel like I should call him back, but don't want the awkward call.

Sat night, I met another guy-OQ-who said he'd definitely call. He text messaged me instead, and I think his message got cut off, but am not sure, so I don't know if I should call him or text him back or what. Anyhow, he's short.